Dear Aliens: Could You Please Stop Fooling Around and Take Over Earth?

Dematerialize all the “heroes” foolishly attempting to get back control of Earth so they can continue killing, plundering, and damaging the planet and its lots of lifeforms for their own personal gain under the guise of glorifying their ideology.

Dear Aliens: please stop playing footsie with us. Conquer the Earth and get on with it. We’re tired of the hide-and-seek. Quit jerking around: take control of the Earth and do what any experienced dominant power performs in freshly dominated territories:

1. Scrap all the tools of war and hostility in your brand-new acquisition. The last thing a colonial administration needs is quarrelsome inner circles creating needless trouble. So ditch all the nukes, tanks, little arms, military aircraft, all of it, and punish those wrongdoers who pursue any hostility.

2. Transfer ultimate control from Earth’s governments to your Federation, or whatever you call it. Like the Roman Empire, enable petty elites to continue running the day-to-day bits, however all the big choices are yours.

3. Share whatever amazing energy sources you have and scrap all the coal-fired plants. Offer us a leg up to 21st century technology so we can lastly let go of the 19th century things.

4. Transfer all personal and state wealth above family dwellings and household possessions to the Federation. Expropriating the wealth of elites ends destabilizing inequality in one fell swoop. This makes for much less bothersome administration of the nest.

5. Put an end to the destruction of Earth’s biosphere and the plunder of its resources for personal greed. In economic terms put an end to externalizing environmental costs, globalization and financialization.

Globalization’s Few Winners and Numerous Losers (July 20, 2016)

6. Dematerialize all the “heroes” mistakenly attempting to get back control of Earth so they can continue eliminating, plundering, and destroying the planet and its numerous lifeforms for their own private gain under the guise of glorifying their ideology.

You may have other administrative objectives, but by all ways, begin with these six.

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